Police Jokes, Humor and Satire
Going To A Lecture 
Saturday, May 9, 2009, 04:04 AM
Posted by Administrator
The man was in no shape to drive, so he wisely left his car parked and walked home. As he was walking unsteadily along, he was stopped by a policeman.

"What are you doing out here at 2 A.M.?" said the officer.

"I'm going to a lecture." the man said.

"And who is going to give a lecture at this hour?" the cop asked.

"My wife." said the man.
9 comments ( 1278 views )
Court Sentence 
Saturday, May 9, 2009, 04:02 AM
Posted by Administrator
A judge grew tired of seeing the same town drunk in front of his bench.

One day the judge glared down at the man, who was still intoxicated, and thundered, "It is the sentence of this court that you be taken from here to a place of execution and there hanged by the neck until DEAD."

The drunk promptly fainted.

The court bailiff started to revive the man, and looked up at the judge, at which time the judge shrugged and responded "I've always wanted to say that."
5 comments ( 637 views )
Get well quick 
Saturday, May 9, 2009, 03:58 AM
Posted by Administrator
A motorcycle patrolman was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hairs on his chest. Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctors hadn't told him about, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown down enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable.

Taped firmly across his hairy chest were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that doesn't come off easily. Written in large black letters was the sentence.

"Get well quick..... from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."
3 comments ( 2363 views )
Don't I Know You 
Saturday, May 9, 2009, 03:45 AM
Posted by Administrator
A police officer, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 in the morning. Not wanting to wake his wife, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed.

Just then, his wife sleepily sat up and said, "Mike, dearest, would you go down to the all-night drug store on the next block and get me some aspirin? I've got a splitting headache."

"Certainly, honey," he said, and feeling his way across the dark room, he got dressed and walked over to the drug store.

As he arrived, the pharmacist looked up in surprise, "Say," said the druggist, "I know you - aren't you a policeman? Officer Fenwick, right?"

"Yeah, so?" said the officer.

"Well, why are you all dressed up like a Fireman?"
4 comments ( 451 views )

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